Christmas Carol
That’s me….Carol. I have to apologise about the limp. It was the donkey. It didn’t mean it. It’s good-natured as donkeys go. And I was pulling its tail at the time. To stop it trampling the baby……what baby ? Little Tristan. Baby Jesus. Oh sorry, that’s me, isn’t it…starting in the middle of the story. Sorry.
It started in October, mid October. We were shopping. They sell organic veg in that shop in the High Street and it was a lovely afternoon; I had my grandkids, Sophie and Marcus, with me so I wandered into Woolies afterwards. There was a big display of things for Halloween at the door, all black and orange plastic, but further in there was one for Christmas. You know the sort of thing…tinsel, lights, chocolate tree things…..Sophie and Marcus were mesmerised. I said ‘it’s a bit early for Christmas’ and they said ‘not at all…..Mummy ( that’s my Aurora) has already bought several Christmas presents and ordered a bumper hamper from Marks & Spencers…so, we’re all right’
My heart sank, I can tell you…..I’m not Christian religious but I always liked festivals and the changing of the year…we always did what we called natural Christmas, making not buying….chestnuts in the fire, fruit cake…the smell of those spices mixed with rum ( one year Aurora, she would have been nearly three, drank a glass of rum and slept for eight hours….first time she’d ever done that ) oh, and nutmeg, cinnamon, ginger……mince pies. She loved baking…little as she was, she stood on a chair with an apron down to her ankles stirring that cake mixture, and me dropping in the cherries and raisins and a bottle of Guinness. She liked the foam.
You wouldn’t think it to look at her now. Professional woman she is…..own office, own laptop, own car…..own house and these two lovely children. A bumper hamper from Marks & Spencer. What kind of Christmas is that ?
So, I had an idea. Serefina, who lives on the next steading, has just had a baby. Tristan. ( Lovely name ) It’s a right old menagerie over there. She’s free range. She keeps chickens and sheep and two donkeys and I have an old stable. Her bloke’s got a beard and both of them have any amount of ethnic clothes, long coats, loose dresses, that sort of thing. He’s called Rufus and he said he could bring some friends for extras.
Well, Serefina thought it was a great idea and he was easily persuaded by the promise of some home-brew afterwards…….. and we got everything ready. So, since today’s Christmas Eve, yesterday afternoon I phoned the kids and said I had a surprise for them, would they like to come over ? They love coming over here…there’s no computer or television but they play sliding down the banister for hours on end and I let climb them trees which Aurora doesn’t……
I’d put some straw in the barn, and Serefina has a pig trough that we stood on a box and we put a blanket to line it. The place was full of chickens…were there chickens in Bethlehem ? Rufus brought over the electrics….lots of wire, a cassette tape recorder (still working ) and a couple of standard lamps ( he’d some idea about halos) and I had several storm lamps for atmosphere. They were coming at five o’clock so we all got dressed at four o’clock. Tristan had had a good sleep and was burbling. Serefina looked quite lovely in the blue robe. Not so sure about Rufus’ friends……I had a green lurex head-dress ( it was an old dance frock cut-up ) a black velvet robe and a box of Turkish Delight for the Christ child.. At the last minute, Rufus and I went out to collect the animals. There weren’t any lambs of course, being winter but we got three sheep and the calmer of the two donkeys. By ten to five we had something. Rufus had managed to get the standard lamps to throw halos round Serefina and his heads, his friends had settled on the floor amongst the animals and Tristan was gurgling at all the activity. I lit the storm lamps, we set the tape recorder playing ‘Silent Night’ and we switched off the main electric light …..that was something. Just like a picture.
I heard the car draw up and then their voices….I’d said come to the stable….and then they were there, the two kids with eyes like saucers and Aurora looking….well, I have to admit it, long-suffering but trying to smile. I did what we practiced…I gave the Turkish Delight to Serefina and she propped it on the pig trough for Tristan. The kids smiled and came closer.
That’s when the power socket went bang…..Rufus’ hook-up not quite there…..the donkey shat itself and tried to run, it knocked the pig trough over and Tristan rolled out, laughing….the donkey started to kick awfully close to the baby so I just grabbed its halter…. it carried on kicking me until I got it to the door. Then I sat down to rub my leg. Bit of a scuffle. Marcus came over…Sophie just behind.
‘What did you think, you two ? I wanted Aurora to hear.
Marcus looked at me and beyond to the others, to Serefina who was picking straw out of Tristan’s hair, to Rufus who was examining the smoking plug in his hand as if it might explain itself. He looked at the sheep who were chewing at the robes of the gang on the floor.
‘ I don’t think Social Services would like it much, Gran.’ He said.
They needn’t think I’m bothering with Easter either !
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